who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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