So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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