the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
