Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize