i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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