im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I need water and some morals
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
