let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
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We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
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I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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