Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You were trust falling into bushes
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize