What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
