we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
