Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The adults are the big ones right?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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