he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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