fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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