hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
