exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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