quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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