Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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