Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize