My liver just broke up with me...
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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