Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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