i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize