Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i love accidental penises.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
