I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
