turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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