Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
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