he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
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he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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