i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Randomize