it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I am spending my child support on dildos
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
