I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize