So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
