remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
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