I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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