there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
