i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
