So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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