why didn't you poke me back
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
