I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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