what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize