i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
