we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
