Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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