The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
