Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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