we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
