he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
