dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
