I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
