Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
