wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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