if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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